Musings on Life and Love

"All My Loving" by wczoraj wieczorem

I know the popular saying contradicts what I’m calling this piece. I’m here to argue otherwise.

Ladies, admit it. There’s something about the bad boy that’s a complete turn on. He brings danger, a sense of adventure, and total drama into your life. Rarely a day goes by where you’ll actually be thinking to yourself, “wow, this day was boring.” It’ll usually be the complete opposite.

But with all this excitement comes a price usually paid for in tears and hurt feelings. For some reason I’ve still yet to figure out, we’re under some kind of crazy misguided notion that we’ll be the ones to change him! We magically delude ourselves into thinking that we’re somehow special enough to be the one who’ll turn him around.

Yeah, right.

I’ve been there and done that. By “done that,” I mean that I was a card-carrying member of the Delusional. I’m also way over it because I’m onto something way better. It’s called NORMAL. (More on this in a bit.) Whenever I think back on this period of my dating life, I recall Fergie’s wise words in her epic song “My Humps”…. Read more…

Anybody remember this song? Cracks me up every single time, and that’s precisely my point.

IT. MAKES. ME. LAUGH. It does not make me want to jump your bones. That is, unless you’re someone I’ve been dating for a long time because you know how to make me laugh when you do a monkey dance and I will somehow find that sexy as hell.

Watch the video before reading the rest of this post. Don’t worry. I’ll even wait for you.

So here’s what I don’t understand. Why do guys think it’s sexy to tell a female, “I want to [bleep] you like an animal,” the first time you meet her? It makes me think of the following things: Read more…

Image by Clipart.com

Remember that song from Aaliyah? “Age ain’t nothing but a number”? The opening lyrics to that classic are as follows:

Age ain’t nothing but a number
Throwing down ain’t nothing but a thang
This lovin’ I have for you
It’ll never change

Being honest is a good thing. In fact, being honest is a “must have” when it comes to any relationship. Having said that, I think another “must have” is discretion.

We all know the saying about how curiosity killed the cat. I’m proposing that curiosity can also kill what would’ve been a beautiful relationship. I know the lyrics reference age as the number in question, but it’s not. What is it exactly I’m talking about? Simple.

I’m talking about the number of people you’ve slept with.

There’s no situation I can think of that would ever make it okay to ask your partner. Don’t get me wrong. I think questions like “do you have any STDs,” “are you married,” “do you have any kids,” and “do you like watching CSI NY too” are perfectly legit questions.

Asking someone to tell you the number of partners they’ve had is like opening up the mother of all cans of proverbial worms combined with what Genie looked like when he was all warped after going to the Dark Side in Disney’s “Aladdin.” Read more…