Seven Reasons I Love Being Single
One of my pet peeves is the single person who hates being partnerless. Hollywood loves to play up the stereotype of the woman who is desperate for anyone to love her. Sadly, a lot of my friends fit right into this cliché. They hate going to special occasions without a date on their arm. Or they complain about being the only unattached person on the planet, which is how life appears from their perspective.
So, I’d like to offer a different perspective. While I look forward to meaningful relationships in my future, I enjoy dating. Yes, someday I hope to find “the one.” But, in the meantime, I relish the chance to get wild on the dance floor and represent “all the single ladies.”
Here are a few reasons I love being single:
1. Social Currency
How often does anyone ask if there are going to be any nice married couples at the party? I’ve yet to hear it. Instead, my very presence as one of the cute single women (or at least one with a great personality, hopefully) increases the potential fun of any social gathering. Parties have a different energy when people have the possibility of meeting the man or women of their dreams… or at least finding someone cute to talk to or make out with later on. Simply being available increases our value as social currency.
2. Ogling Season
The entire season of summer seems designed with the single person in mind. Surfers out of their wetsuits. Guys jogging without their shirts, and girls in bikinis. Cute neighbors by the pool. Basically, it’s ogling season, and when we’re single, we can look and appreciate without anyone getting jealous.
One of the fun things about being single is developing all of the little crushes. Just about everywhere I go, I have someone to look forward to seeing: the guy at work who impresses the kids with his dinosaur sketches, the cute guy on my soccer team who always compliments my defense, my friend’s friend who teases me at all the parties. The joy of crushes is that most of the time, we don’t even have any expectations of pursuing a relationship, but sometimes we’re delightfully surprised when one forms.
4. Friend time
We all swear we won’t dump our friends once we get involved in a relationship. Yet, the more we hang out with someone, the more our calendar fills up with activities with that person. Sometimes, we stop making our own plans altogether and just assume our weekends will be spent with our significant other. When we’re single again, that first weekend can be a wake-up call, as we realize we didn’t make any plans, and our friends no longer invite us out. So, we’re forced to pick up that phone and reconnect with our friends. We rediscover how fun quality friend time can be.
Relationships often take a lot out of us emotionally. When I’m truly single, I get so much more done on all my projects. It’s as though all that brain space dedicated to dating, relationships, or breaking up is suddenly freed up for other interests. We have time to take those classes, write that book, or do whatever it is that became less of a priority when we were spending quality time with our guy or girl.
When I asked a friend what he loved most about being single, he gave me a very succinct answer: self-reliance. When we’ve been in a relationship or even serial dating for awhile, we forget what it’s like being alone. We get used to doing a lot of the things we love or even those chores we loathe with someone else. Being on our own again means relearning that alone doesn’t have to mean lonely. Not only is it okay to watch movies all by ourselves, we can finally watch the ones we wanted to see, but which had always been voted out.
7. Endless possibilities
My favorite part of being single is the feeling that anything can happen at any moment. I love the idea that life is full of potential. Being in a serious relationship can be wonderful, but when we are with someone, the future can become somewhat limited. Where we’ll live, what type of job we’ll have, where and how often we’ll travel, how long we can get away each time—these are all serious considerations when we are involved with someone. Without the extra dimension of a significant other, much of the world opens up to us. We feel like we can go anywhere, do anything, and dream as wide as we wish.
Thus, I say that we enjoy this time to ourselves. Being single now doesn’t mean being lonely forever. So we should savor it.